


Song For You

by Sugaandspice



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: ALL THE FLUFF, Fluff, I love fluff, I love my precious baby, I love my precious son, M/M, Oblivious Yamaguchi Tadashi, Tsukishima Kei is Bad at Feelings, Tsukishima Kei is a Dork, Tsukishima is my salty son, Tsukishima is my son too, Yamaguchi Tadashi's Birthday, Yamaguchi is my son, Yamaguchi's birthday is tomorrow, mix tape for Yamaguchi, tsukkiyama - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-09
Updated: 2016-11-09
Packaged: 2018-08-30 02:23:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,598
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8515054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sugaandspice/pseuds/Sugaandspice
Summary: Tsukishima has never been good with words, but luckily there are other's who can say the words for him.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sugaonii](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sugaonii/gifts).



> Gifted to my best friend because I got the idea from making a playlist for him.

            When Tadashi got home from school he was expecting to sit down and do his homework then shower, eat dinner and prepare for Saturday morning's volleyball practice. What he was not expecting was to pull out a notebook, one that definitely did not belong to him yet also had his name on the front, and a CD to fall out of it.

            Tadashi opened the cover and found a small, homemade pocket made from construction paper and duct tape and he assumed that was where the CD had fallen from. He was smart, but it didn’t take a genius to figure out who it was from as there was only one person he knew who own pterodactyl duct tape.

            Tadashi giggled softly and picked the CD up off his floor. He looked at the small clear case, but couldn’t find anything on it explaining what the disk was and why Kei had put it in his bag. He looked back at the notebook and found the recognizable scrawl of his best friend’s writing.

            _Tadashi,_

_As you can tell there’s a CD in the front cover. I made you a playlist. I’ve been working on this for a long time and I was going to wait until Christmas to give it to you, but then I came up with something else to give to you instead. Every song is relevant to you, me, us, in one way or another and I’ll have a paragraph or two explaining the purpose behind it. Each song’s explanation is on one page. Don’t skip around though, okay? I know I could have just made you a file or something and sent it to you, but I know you like CD’s so that’s why I did it this way. I hope you like it._

_-Kei_

Tadashi smiled and brushed a strand of hair behind his ear. He wasn’t entirely sure what the purpose of this way, but he assumed he would figure it out along the way. He grabbed his laptop and plugged his headphones in before putting in the CD and sitting back. He took a deep breath and pressed play then turned the page in the notebook and let the music fill his ears.

            **Track One: You’ve got a Friend in Me by Randy Newman**

_I know you really like Disney music and Toy Story is one of your favorite movies so I thought I would have to include this one. Honestly, this was the first one that I thought of to add. There are so many lines I could quote for you and tell you are more important, but when it comes down to it, they’re all pretty important. When it comes down to it “there isn't anything I wouldn't do for you” we’ve pretty much always been best friends and I don’t doubt that’s the way it’s always going to be._

**Track Two: If These Sheets Were States by All Time Low**

_“If these sheets were the states, and you were miles away, I'd fold them end over end to bring you closer to me because I don't sleep at all without you pressed up against me. I settle for long distance calls, I'm lost in empty pillow talk again.” I know that sounds a little erotic and I’m fairly certain that’s the way it’s meant in the song, but I’ve always taken it a little differently. I still remember the first time you crawled into bed with me; it was years ago and it was one of the first times you spent the night at my house. You had your own futon on the floor and you were fine until it started storming. I could hear you whimpering and whining but I didn’t know what to do about it. You waited five minutes before crawling into bed with me. I was awake, but pretended not to be because I thought you’d be embarrassed otherwise. There was a loud clap of thunder and you let out a whine and grabbed onto me and I hesitated before putting my arm around you. You laid your head on my chest and within minutes you were old cold. Letting you sleep in my bed that night opened up the door for you to do it again and then you never wanted to sleep anywhere else. You kept telling me you slept better next to me and to be honest with you, I think that I do too, so I never argued and I let you sleep in my bed and you have always woken up happier than I usually ever see you. Then there was the time you went on vacation with your parents and you called me every single night because “Tsukki please, I can’t sleep without you” and I knew that wasn’t entirely true because the only times you sleep with me is when you sleep over at my house, but I didn’t argue and I talked to you until you fell asleep. I’m still not sure who liked it more; me or you._

**Track Three: Missing You by All Time Low**

_This song is a lot less romantic than any of the other ones that are going to be on this CD but it is still important. I know what you have been through; I’m the only one that you have ever told. I know you worry and stress and I know you get sad and insecure and have a lot of stuff to deal with, but I want you to know that having anxiety and depression doesn’t make you any less of a person. I know there have been times that you have wanted to give up, but you haven’t and that proves just how strong you really are. “Now don't lose your fight, kid, it only takes a little push to pull on through, with so much left to do, you'll be missing out, and we'll be missing you.” You’ve been to hell and back, but you haven’t given up and I am so proud of you._

**Track Four: The Edge of Tonight by All Time Low**

_Oh Tadi. This one is a pretty good one too. Look, I know I can be an asshole, but you don’t seem to care. You laugh at my stupid jokes and you stand up for me and you have always bragged about me. I know you get insecure when girls try to talk to you, I know you think they just want to talk about me, but you don’t have to worry about that. “Cause I can't breathe without you near. You keep me safe, keep me sane, keep me honest, you keep me alive.” You are the only person that I want to be around. You make me a better person and everything has always been better whenever we’re together._

**Track Five: Fine by Me by Andy Grammer**

_I already know what you’re thinking and yes, I really mean what this song says. People know we’re best friends; we’re that package deal where if one is missing the other always gets asked where they are. It doesn’t bother me though. I know there are times that you have come to me crying because you think that I’m going to get sick of you and leave. I know you tell me that you want us to be friends for a long time, I know that you have even said forever, and I know we have a long road ahead of us and we may or may not go to the same university but “I'm just saying it's fine by me if you never leave and we can live like this forever. It's fine by me.”_

**Track Six: Crazy Beautiful by Andy Grammer**

_“Isn't he cra-crazy beautiful? Isn't he stra-strange and wonderful? And I think I love him more than I even understand.” I changed the lyrics just a tiny bit. I have nothing more to say._

**Track Seven: I Choose You by Andy Grammer**

_“I choose you, to be by my side. I choose you, to hold me at night. It's the biggest decision I'm about to get right. I choose you, I choose you.” No matter what happens, no matter where we go or what we do or anything else. I will always choose you._

**Track Eight: Remind You by Andy Grammer**

_I think this song is particularly important. I feel bad for once again bringing it back to your insecurities but that always seems to be a common topic in our conversations. I know there has been multiple times where you have come to be and curled up on my bed or in my lap and sobbed for hours because of it and that is why this song is important.  I know it can take a while to get you to calm down and feel okay again and I’m sorry for that. I’m sorry that I can’t help you feel better any other way. I promise you though, that I will never stop trying. “I will remind you, I will remind you. I will be, I'll be your memory. I will remind you, I will remind you. All you need is someone else to see. I will remind you.” I will ALWAYS remind you._

**Track Nine: One Call Away by Charlie Puth**

_You know this already, but whenever you need me all you have to do is call. If you want me to come over then all you have to do is ask. I am always going to be there for you. I know that I don’t say it very often, but I really do care about you, Tadashi. You are my best friend and I’m grateful for that and also for you._

**Track Ten: Can’t Help Falling in Love with You by Christian Akridge**

_Ah the famous Elvis Presley has yet another song covered. It’s a nice song, quite beautiful and also quite true. That is part of the point of this entire CD. I, Tsukishima Kei, have fallen in love with you, Yamaguchi Tadashi. I probably should have told you sooner, but all that matters is I’m telling you now. “Take my hand; take my whole life, too, for I can't help falling in love with you.”_

**Track Eleven: Kiss Me by Ed Sheeran**

_I know you love Ed Sheeran so obviously I had to include at least one of his songs. I thought this one was a good one. “I was made to keep your body warm, but I'm cold as the wind blows so hold me in your arms.” You have always told me how I’m warm and that was one reason you like to sleep cuddled up next to me. We don’t differ much in height, you come up to my shoulder and I’ve always thought that was kinda perfect. I know that sounds cliché, but that’s what you have started to do to me._

**Track Twelve: Photograph by Ed Sheeran**

_(I said at least one, okay?) Honestly, I love this song. I didn’t used to, but the more you listened to it, the more I started to like it. It’s a beautiful song and it’s so much softer than anything I usually listen to (but then again all of these songs are since you don’t like heavy music) but I still think it’s relevant to us. I know how you like to take pictures and how you always take so many pictures of me (yes, I saw the album on your phone) and how you always want to take them of us but it bothers me less than it used to. Photographs are how you keep memories. No matter what happens, you can always look back at the picture and remember the time in the picture. It’s kinda calming to think about._

**Track Thirteen: Tenerife Sea by Ed Sheeran**

_“Should this be the last thing I see, I want you to know it's enough for me, cause all that you are is all that I'll ever need.” There was one time, homecoming I think it was, and we had gotten ready separately (I’m still trying to figure out how you convinced me to go) and your mom took us so you had to come and pick me up and I came downstairs and I saw you standing there and you looked amazing. I had never seen you so dressed up before and you looked so nice. As crazy as it sounds-as crazy as I sound-I’m pretty sure my heart skipped a beat whenever I saw you. I knew right then and there that I could die that night and be happy. I had found everything that I ever needed in you and you, through the course of our friendship, had shown me what love really looks like._

**Track Fourteen: Thinking Out Loud by Ed Sheeran**

_I have always found it an incredibly cliché thing to fall in love with your best friend, but here I am. To tell you the truth, I’ve felt this way for a little while, but I thought that if I ignored it then it would go away. It never did. So here I am, trying to confess to you in a way where I don’t have to speak and stumble over my words and deal with your wide eyes and gentle hands grabbing at mine. Fuck. You know this song. You’re the reason I know this song. I know you love it and I had to add it. It’s pretty significant._

**Track Fifteen: Favorite Record by Fall Out Boy**

_This one isn’t as relevant to us as any of the others are, but it’s still a good song. It’s sung in past tense so I think it might actually be a break up song or a song where the guy meets his ex and they reminisce about how things used to be, but it’s still a good song. There aren’t many Fall Out Boy songs that are really romantic but this one kind of is (despite it possible being a break up song) so I added it._

**Track Sixteen: Wanted by Hunter Hayes**

_Before you ask, yes I still hate country music, but I know you like some of it and since this is for and mostly about you I needed to add it. I feel like I’ve said that a lot, but it’s true. There are a lot of things about myself that I have questioned. I’m grumpy and sarcastic and as some people like to call me “a freaking skyscraper” and that I can’t really change but the others I could. I have no idea where I am going with this. Okay look I like you a lot and I just want to make you feel like you’re wanted because you are. You’re really, truly wanted._

**Track Seventeen: If You Told Me To by Hunter Hayes**

_“Yeah I could be so good at loving you, but only if you told me to.” That sounds a little bit bad because it makes it sound like I won’t love you if you don’t tell me to, but that is not the case because clearly I already do love you._

**Track Eighteen: Cry With You by Hunter Hayes**

_“When you try not to look at me; scared that I'll see you hurting. You're not hiding anything, no and frankly it's got me worried. Nobody knows you better than I do. I keep my promises, I'm fighting for you. You're not alone; I'll listen 'till your tears give out. You're safe and sound; I swear that I won't let you down. What's hurting you I, I feel it too, I mean it when I say, when you cry, I cry with you, with you.” I promise you that you never have to go through things alone. I am always going to be here for you._

**Track Nineteen: Invisible by Hunter Hayes**

_“So your confidence is quiet to them quiet looks like weakness, but you don't have to fight it cause you're strong enough to win without a war. Every heart has a rhythm, let yours beat out so loudly that everyone can hear it. Yeah, I promise you don't need to hide it anymore. Oh, and never be afraid of doing something different. Dare to be something more. Yeah, the words cut deep but they don't mean you're all alone and you're not invisible. Hear me out, there's so much more of this life than what you're feeling now and someday you'll look back on all these days and all this pain is gonna be invisible.” I promise that one day, even if it is years from now, you’re going to look back and be glad that you went through everything that you did. The person you are now is the person who is creating who you will be in the future. Every experience and emotion you have now is significant for who you will be later._

**Track Twenty: Still Fallin’ by Hunter Hayes**

_“But after all this time, you'd think I'd be used to the pull of your gravity and after flying so high for so long, who would think, I'm still learning, still burning, still fallin', still fallin'” We’ve been friends for a long time now and I still learn new things about you. The more I learn, the more I have to love. You’re shy and a little awkward, but you’re smart and kind and by far the nicest person I have ever met. You’re a good person, Yama._

**Track Twenty One: All of Me by John Legend**

_“Cause all of me loves all of you.  Love your curves and all your edges, all your perfect imperfections. Give your all to me; I'll give my all to you. You're my end and my beginning, even when I lose I'm winning cause I give you all of me and you give me all of you.” You have every last part of me and I can assure you that is never going to change._

**Track Twenty Two: Play it Again by Luke Bryan**

_“She was like, "Oh, my God, this is my song.  We've been listenin' to the radio all night long.  I can't believe that it came back on, but here it is."  She was like, "Come here boy, I wanna dance."  'Fore I said a word she was takin' my hand, spinnin' in the headlights she gave me a goodnight kiss and I said, "Play it again, play it again, play it again." And she said, "Play it again, play it again, play it again."” I will admit that I like this song. It makes me think of that one time in junior high when we were in my room doing homework and listening to music. A song came on and it was a really old song I wouldn’t even think you would know because I wouldn’t even have known it if it weren’t for my uncle but you gasped and jumped up and tried to get me to dance with you. I didn’t want to dance so I sat there and watched you instead and you looked so happy that I couldn’t help but smile. I can’t remember what it was called, but I’m glad the song made you happy._

**Track Twenty Three: Shut Up and Kiss Me by Marianas Trench**

_This is not exactly a romantic song and the lyrics do not fit us at all (I mean, your mom loves me) but the title is important because I want to yell it at you sometimes. I never mind when you talk and tell stories and I love whenever you get passionate about something and go on and on about it, but sometimes all I want to do is tell you to shut up and kiss me instead._

**Track Twenty Four: While We’re Young by Marianas Trench**

_“So sing it back if you're with me. I wanna hear how your heart speaks. While we're young, while we're young. This should be the time of our lives and I've been so lost without you. Are you lost without me too? While we're young, while we're young, this should be the time of our lives.” I don’t know how you feel, but if it’s the same as I do then I’m more than ready to take the step and make the jump._

**Track Twenty Five: Porcelain by Marianas Trench**

_“The slow and simple melody of tears you cannot keep from me. It's alright if you don't know what you need.” I ask you what you want and what you need a lot and you always say you don’t know and sometimes it’s stressful because I just wanted to help you and it made me feel like you were pushing me away or didn’t want my help, but it’s okay if you don’t know. Like I have told you multiple times throughout the course of this, I am always going to be here for you. I’ll help you figure out what’s going on and what you need and how to fix it. We’ll get through it together._

**Track Twenty Six: Beside You by Marianas Trench**

_“When your tears are spent on your last pretense and your tired eyes refuse to close and sleep in your defense. When it's in your spine like you've walked for miles and the only thing you want is just to be still for a while. If your heart wears thin I will hold you up and I will hide you when it gets too much. I'll be right beside you. I'll be right beside you. When you're overwhelmed and you've lost your breath. When the space between the things you know is blurry nonetheless. When you try to speak but you make no sound and the words you want are out of reach but they've never been so loud.” This song makes me think of you again for the same reason the other sad songs do. I hope listening to them doesn’t upset you and if it does then call me and I’ll come over and help you through it, okay? I promise. Another line I like is “I'm just trying to keep this together, because I could do worse and you could do better.” And I think I like this one because of how true it rings. I couldn’t do better than you, I know that much. You’re beautiful and smart and funny and kind and there is no one better than you. Me on the other hand, I’m salty and sarcastic and kind of a dick and you could do a lot better than I am. I promise I will always be here for you though. I’ll keep you safe and protect you from everything._

**Track Twenty Seven: Good to You by Marianas Trench**

_“I thought I saw a sign somewhere between the lines. Maybe it's me; maybe I only see what I want. And I still have your letter just got caught between someone I just invented, who I really am and who I've become. And now I do want you to know I hold you up above everyone. And now I do want you to know I think you'd be good to me and I'd be so good to you.” There’s been a few times where I’ve thought that you had feelings for me but I have never been to sure. I wasn’t sure if you did or if I made it all up because that’s what I wanted to see and hear. I have the letter you wrote me a few years back, telling me that I was your best friend you were glad we were friends and all. It’s an old letter, but I still read it every now and then. It’s a nice reminder whenever I start to feel bad and feel like you’re better than I am (which you are, don’t even argue with me. I know you’re shaking your head as you’re reading this). I have always put you above everyone else. You’re an amazing and kind person and I don’t know anyone else who would put up with me like you do. I also want you to know that I would treat you well too. That’s a promise._

**Track Twenty Eight: When the Day Met the Night by Panic! At the Disco**

_“When the moon fell in love with the sun. All was golden in the sky. All was golden when the day met the night.” Okay so I know that your name does not actually mean sun, but you’re still my son. You’re always happy and bright and shining and basically the sun whereas I’m the moon. You know that much though, I mean, my name actually means moon. Fuck, I’m starting to get off track. You’re my sun, Tadashi. You are what brings more of a light into my day and makes getting up a little bit easier. You make things better just by existing and being in my life. We’re quite different, much like the day and the night, but from the moment I fell in love with you everything was so much better. All was golden in the skin._

**Track Twenty Nine: Battle Scars by Paradise Fears**

_“I'll carry you home.  No, you're not alone.  Keep marching on, this is worth fighting for, you know we've all got battle scars. You've had enough, but just don't give up. Stick to your guns, you are worth fighting for. You know we've all got battle scars. Keep marching on.” I know what you’re doing whenever you don’t answer my texts right away. It’s always the same thing. I know that’s what you did and are then regretting whenever I call and you’re crying and trying to speak but you can’t even say my name. It’s okay though, Yamaguchi. I know you’re struggling and I know that you just want the pain to end, but don’t give up. The pain will end one day and you’ll be bright and happy and whenever you look back on all of this you’re going to be happy that you didn’t give up. If you don’t go through bad things, if you don’t struggle then life would be boring. Bad things have to happen to allow you to appreciate the good things that happen. Just don’t give up. Those are your battle scars and maybe life is unfair by putting so much more on you than on others, but we’re only given what we can handle and you being able to handle all of this just show how fucking strong you really are. Wear your battle scars with pride because “to not have some battle scars is to never have lived.”_

**Track Thirty: When You Come Home by Paradise Fears**

_“You may cross the world all by yourself, you tell me that everything you want is somewhere else, but when you make it back around and your shoes are all worn down, I’ll be waiting for you when you come home.” No matter where you go, I will always be waiting when you come back. If you need a home then you can find it in me. I’m the safe place you can go when things get rocky or scary and I’m the place you can go when you’re happy and want to share it. I’ll always be your home._

**Track Thirty One: You to Believe in by Paradise Fears**

_You know the shit that I’ve been through. You know why I don’t talk to my brother anymore and why my dad is rarely at home and why my mom never cares I leave to go to your house even on the nights when you call me at two in morning crying because you need someone and you need them right now. You know the reason for everything going on in my life and that includes the fact that no one has ever really been on my side. That is, no one but you. I’m grateful for that. I know whenever I need someone to turn to I can always go to you. Sometimes you can tell when I feel bad anyways and you talk to me and by the time we’re in our neighborhood, I already feel better. You have a way of doing that, making me feel better quickly. I guess this is all a long winded way of saying thank you. Thanks for doing that and for always being someone I can believe in. Thanks for never letting me down._

**Track Thirty Two: Next to Me by Paradise Fears**

_“Throw your world down and come into me. Stay next to me, right next to me. All you’ve got is everything I need. Stay next to me, right next to me, right next to me.” Like I just told you, nobody has ever been on my side except for you. You are the kind of person that I need and have always needed. Whenever we were little and you started to follow me around it bothered me. I liked being alone and you took that away from me but as we grew older I learned I didn’t like being alone after all. You’re next to me in life and I want you to stay right next to me._

**Track Thirty Three: Who You Are by Paradise Fears**

_“There’s one thing in life that I’ve learned so far, it’s that we’re all a little stronger than we think we are and you can bend a little farther, but just remember who you are.” I know that you think you aren’t strong, but you are. You are so much stronger than you think you are. If you weren’t strong then you wouldn’t be here, but you are and that proves it. I know you still struggle, but you can always beat it. Just know I believe in you. You can do anything that you set your mind to, I have seen it happen before and I know I’m going to see it happen in the future. You went from someone who shook as he served the ball to someone who actually wanted to be put in the game and someone who actually wanted to play and help the team win. I knew you were anxious during the match with Aoba Josai but I had complete faith in you. I knew you could do it and you did._

**Track Thirty Four: Got Your Back by Ricky Dillon**

_“Oh, you're always there for me. Oh, can't think of no one else. Oh, together through it all. No one can compete with that; just know I always got your back. No one can compete with that; just know I always got your back.”_

**Track Thirty Five: Try by Simple Plan**

_“But I'll try, to never disappoint you, I'll try, until I get it right, I've always been so reckless, all of my life, but I'll try, for you.” I know I’m kind of a mess and there are times where you’ve needed me and I haven’t been able to be there for you, but I’m trying my best to change that. I want to always be there for you. I don’t ever want to let you down or upset you or make you sad or anything anywhere close to those things. I want to make you happy, but as long as I have you then I can do anything. I will always try for you._

**Track Thirty Six: Boom by Simple Plan**

_“You're my favorite song, my sing-along. You shine bright like lighters in the dark, and you're my clarity, the best part of me, you still make my crazy little heart go boom!” Even years later you still drive my heart crazy; he first time it happened I thought I was having a heart attack because I didn’t know what it was. I looked at you and as stupid and cliché as it sounds, you looked like you were glowing and that was when I realized I was in love._

**Track Thirty Seven: Kiss Me like Nobody’s Watching by Simple Plan**

_“So kiss me like nobody's watching. Yeah people are talking, it doesn't matter what they say. Just kiss me in the middle of the streets to let the whole world see that there's nobody else for me. There's nobody else for me.” I am not big on public displays of affection, I never have been, and half the time whenever we’re walking home I don’t even talk. I let you do all the talking because I don’t have anything to say and I just like listening to you tell stories anyways. I want to be with you though. I am completely sure that there’s nobody else for me. Even if there was I wouldn’t want them because you are the one I have always wanted and the one I always will want. I want to be able to hold your hand and show you off and show everyone that you’re mine. Now, I’m saying I want this but I’m also not sure it will happen because like I said, I hate PDA and I hate when people are in my business. One day though, I’ll take you out and hold your hand and kiss your cheek and show the entire world (well everyone we pass) that you are mine and no one else’s. I’ll kiss you like nobody is watching._

**Track Thirty Eight: I Don’t Wanna Go To Bed by Simple Plan**

_So this song doesn’t entirely fit but the chorus does. “I don't wanna go to bed. I don't wanna go to bed without you.” It’s true. I don’t. I told you at the beginning and I’ll tell you again now, I always sleep better next to you._

**Track Thirty Nine: Perfectly Perfect by Simple Plan**

_“You might not think you're a supermodel, but you look like one to me. I'd rather have your picture on my phone than on the cover of a magazine. It's hard to think that a guy like you could have any insecurities. It's funny how all the things you would change, are all things that are cute to me and I know you don't believe me and you think that I'm a fool, but I don't care. Maybe, you'll never see in you what I see. The little things you do that make me go crazy, I'm not crazy, you're perfectly perfect to me.” Okay so where do I begin? You hate your hair, you’ve said it’s too dark and you hate that little bit that sticks up on the top of your head. I think it’s pretty cute though and black is my favorite color. You hate your eyes because they have bags under them from the nights you can’t sleep, but I’m telling you now that nobody notices. Even if they do (they don’t) they wouldn’t say anything because everyone else has trouble sleeping sometimes too and just like you they wake up with bags under their eyes. I know the thing you hate most is your freckles, but that’s what I love most. They’re cute and blend in nicely with your skin tone and I love how they make a little bridge across your nose and how you have a few across your back. One cluster almost looks like a smiling face. You’re beautiful, Yamaguchi Tadashi, don’t ever forget that._

**Track Forty: I Dream About You by Simple Plan**

_“Some people dream about money and fame and taking rides on private planes, but they don't know you like I know you. Some people dream about looking good like movie stars in Hollywood, but they don't know you like I know you. They don't understand. They think I'm a fool. if only they could see. I dream about you, Heaven only knows I do. I dream about you, every single night it's true, I dream about you.” This doesn’t really need an explanation. You are often a featured guest in my dreams. I’m thankful they’re all good ones and I don’t dream about losing you like you have about me a few times. I had one dream where we were old and married and parents; we had a set of twins and an older son and you were happy. We were sitting on the porch in a swing and you squeezed my hand and looked at me and when I asked you what you wanted you just smiled and said “I’ve always wanted to grow old with you” and that was exactly what we were doing._

**Track Forty One: James Dean and Audrey Hepburn by Sleeping with Sirens**

_“They say that love is forever. Your forever is all that I need. Please stay as long as you need. Can't promise that things won't be broken, but I swear that I will never leave. Please stay forever with me.” I don’t think this one needs much explaining but I’m going to explain anyways. If there comes a time where you don’t want to deal with me anymore then that’s okay, bit I want you to know that as long as you want to stay then I’m going to be here for you. I can’t promise you that things won’t be bad, whether they’re things you have to deal with or I have to deal with or whether we fight and have to deal with it together, but I can promise you that I won’t leave. Even if we fight and our relationship gets fuzzy, I will still be here for you. If you want to stay forever, I’m more than happy to let you._

**Track Forty Two: Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol**

_“If I lay here, if I just lay here, would you lie with me and just forget the world? Forget what we're told before we get too old show me a garden that's bursting into life.” Sometimes on the days where you skip school because you aren’t feeling well or aren’t happy I want to come over and lay with you. I don’t ever really want to talk about anything; I just want to lay with you until you feel better or feel happier again. We can forget the world and forget everyone and everything else because nothing else even matters besides you and me. Forget what everyone else has told us about being young and losing friends after high school and not finding the person that you love until you’re in your mid-twenties and already know what you’re going to do with your entire life and all that shit. It’s bullshit so let’s just forget it all before we get too old to dream._

**Track Forty Three: Rescue by The Summer Set**

_“Now it's 3 o'clock in the morning and you're cryin' on the curb. If you never scrape your knees, how're 'ya ever gonna learn? Never said that life was easy, but we're gonna make it work. When you'll need me I'll be there, a friend in the eye of the storm. And when all the lights burn out I'll carry you out of the dark, I'll come to your rescue. And if I didn't believe in you, why the hell am I still here? Like an hourglass, but we lasted, even after all these years.” I will always come to your rescue._

**Track Forty Four: Wild by Troye Sivan**

_“Cause when you look like that, I've never ever wanted to be so bad. It drives me wild. You're driving me wild, wild, wild.” I remember that one time when we were thirteen or so and you somehow convinced me into a couple’s costume for Halloween and you ended up dressing as a princess. If I would have known you were going to look like you did I would have never agreed to it because damn. I think that was the first time I really had any impure thoughts about you but I had just seen my best friend in a dress and he looked hot as hell so could you really blame me? I’m not entirely proud of what I did that night after I got back home, but I don’t have any regrets either._

**Track Forty Five: Youth by Troye Sivan**

_“My youth, my youth is yours trippin' on skies, sippin' waterfalls. My youth, my youth is yours runaway now and forevermore. My youth, my youth is yours a truth so loud you can't ignore. My youth, my youth, my youth, my youth is yours.” My youth is yours and if you’ll take it then my entire future it yours as well._

**Track Forty Six: We Don’t Believe What’s On TV by Twenty One Pilots**

_“I need to know that when I fail you'll still be here cause if you stick around, I'll sing you pretty sounds and we'll make money selling your hair.” I can’t sing for shit, but as long as you stick by me I will always try my hardest to give you the things you need. I will always support you whole heartedly. And don’t worry, I’m not going to shave your head in your sleep and sell it for money. We won’t be that broke._

**Track Forty Seven: Sad Song by We The Kings**

_“Without you, I feel broke, like I'm half of a whole. Without you, I've got no hand to hold. Without you, I feel torn like a sail in a storm. Without you, I'm just a sad song. I'm just a sad song.”_

**Track Forty Eight: Beside You by 5 Seconds of Summer**

_“I'm trying to find the words to say. I wish I was, I wish I was beside you.”_

**Track Forty Nine: PillowTalk by Zayn Malik**

_“I'd love to hold you close, tonight and always.  I'd love to wake up next to you.  I'd love to hold you close, tonight and always. I'd love to wake up next to you.” As I told you twice already, I love falling asleep next to you. I fall asleep sooner and I’m always warmer and I know this is a more a “Tadashi” thing to say than a “Kei” thing to say (I mean that with love) but I also feel safer sleeping next to you and the only thing better than falling asleep next to you is waking up next to you. Whenever you stay over the first thing I see whenever I wake up is your face. Your nose is all cute and scrunched up like a rabbit and you just look so happy and relaxed. I want to be able to wake up to that, to you, every single day of my life._

**Track Fifty: Wonderwall by Oasis**

_“Today was gonna be the day but they'll never throw it back to you. By now you should've somehow realized what you're not to do. I don't believe that anybody feels the way I do, about you now and all the roads that lead you there are winding and all the lights that light the way are blinding. There are many things that I would like to say to you but I don't know how. I said maybe, you're gonna be the one that saves me and after all, you're my wonderwall. I said maybe, you're gonna be the one that saves me and after all, you're my wonderwall.” You might be wondering why this song is last and not in alphabetical order (per artist) like all of the others. It’s more because of the line “there are many things that I would like to say to you but I don't know how” because that’s probably one of the most relevant lines in any of these songs. I have a lot to say to you but I’m kinda awkward and bad with words and I don’t really even find talking to you easy half of the time. I know you like music though and one of your favorite books it that one about the two people who make a music playlist (or is that a movie?) and I know you like old/classic things and little traditions from the seventies or eighties or whatever making mixed tapes for your crush was from so I thought about doing that. I gave up on it but later brought it back and went with it because I had so much to say and couldn’t figure out any way to say it and I tried to start this CD and it all fell into place so this was my way of figuring out how to tell you everything it is I want you to know. I know for a fact that you were the one that saved me. You are my wonderwall and I am yours._

The last song ended and Tadashi smiled. He loved this, all of it. Kei has picked great songs and so many of them were songs that he liked. He started to text him when he noticed another page in the notebook.

            _So what did you think? I  hope you liked it. I spent months working on it and putting it together and writing all of the notes for them. I wanted to make it a little bit longer, but I ran out of songs that fit us. There were a couple others, but some people I just refuse to listen to and I had to listen to the songs to get this done. Happy Birthday, Tadashi. I know it’s not until tomorrow, but I wanted to tell you now. I have a few more things planned for then. I love you._

_Love, Kei._

**Author's Note:**

> Here's the playlist!  
> https://open.spotify.com/user/simply_rachel/playlist/1KYCKilbdyEPupJSfe9GYM  
> Hopefully the link works. I tried to use a different website because I'm not sure if you need a spotify account to actually use spotify but there was only one website I found and it wouldn't let me publish the playlist (screams) so I had to stick with this one.
> 
> Also, I know Yamaguchi's birthday isn't until tomorrow, but in the story Tsukishima gave it to him the day before his birthday so that's why I'm posting it now. Plus, it's already tomorrow in Japan so if you want to be technical it is already his birthday.


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